I need to center myself this weekend. Somehow. I'm getting to that point where people talk to me, but I'm not mentally present. I can't really say that it's because I'm tired, but I'm thinking about so many events, things to do, and people at once that it becomes difficult to put myself in the moment.

This is an unpublished post that I wrote a couple of weeks ago:
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I didn’t get it at first, but now I do. It’s a combination of nervousness, stress, and fatigue. Anxiety, I guess you can call it.

“I feel normal,” I said naïvely.

A more accurate response would have been, “I feel this way all the time.”

I started blaming it on not getting enough sleep, but in all honesty, that’s not my biggest problem.

I’m a control freak. There, I said it. How is it that I’ve known this term for so long, have heard it tossed around from occasion to occasion, and yet never put two and two together?

I’m always organizing, calendaring, taking over meetings, discussing, “running late” (not necessarily being tardy, but rushing from one meeting/class to the next), and worst of all, getting frustrated at people when they mess up my efforts at all of this.

I need to take one big, fat, chill pill.

Better yet, I need to find something that works for me… something calming, relaxing, fun, and just good for me.

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Any ideas?

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